Saturday, October 29, 2022

Candy Corn Addiction

 


Candy Corn is the Halloween  candy that everyone loves to hate.  It is based on the flavors of Honey, Vanilla, Cannula wax, and sugar.  It is a seasonal addiction that once tasted there is no going back.  And it doesn't even taste all that great.  You just can't stop eating it until the bag is gone and your craving more.  

Then it happens, starting slowly creeping up on you subtly and silently, the Candy Corn hang over.  There's no avoiding it, no going back, once you've over indulged in Candy Corn the self perpetuated yucks are soon to follow.  Your teeth feel fuzzy, your tongue feels scratchy, the liquid behind your eyes dries up and makes your head feel like an old shoe.  The whole experience is pretty terrible.   You may suffer from this condition for the rest of the day, maybe even into the evening, but when you come out of it and start feeling like the old you, what do you do, you stick your hand in the bag and grab more Candy Corn.  After all it is a serious addiction.  

There are several agencies that deal with addictions.  Most of them end in the word anonymous.  Is is possible that I need to go to an Anonymous meeting in order to deal with a Candy Corn addiction?  I keep eating them, throwing away the bag, then finding myself in line at the store with another Brach's Candy bag in hand.  I'm a sick man.

The first part of an Anonymous meeting is to introduce yourself to the other Candy eaters, and announce your addiction.  You may meet another individual who has a similar addiction to the tasty morsels of evil.  You might find a friend who can share stories with you on self created head aches and the pukes that come on at the wrong time, every time.  Anonymous meetings are a sure fired way of finding sympathy amongst the Candy stricken masses.  

This time of year doesn't help.  The legion of tiny costume clad fiends who thrive on the Sugar laden goodies.  These little packages of joy are Candy Corn pushers.  It's a terrible thing when you can't say no to the Candy Corn instigators who are knocking at my door speaking the magical incantation, "Trick or Treat."  What shall we do?  

Peace and Balance,

John

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